Monday, May 28, 2012

Rindu hadir atas dasar keterikatan

"I miss you" doesn't always mean "I want you back". 
Sometimes, it only means "You crossed my mind and I hope you're doing fine"

Yes. I miss you.

But I cannot tell you this.

Even if I want to.

Because everyone can see that I do.

Even you.

I have no need to tell you.

But for reasons unknown...

...I really wish you would tell me...

...Over and over again.

"Rindu itu hadir atas dasar keterikatan."

Somebody that I used to know.

I shouldn't be writing this.

Or even thinking this.

But here I am.


Pouring it out.

No. I don't miss you. At all. It's just that I didn't think that it would feel like this. So...empty. It's not jealousy. I moved on way before you could even think it. It's not hurt. I don't have any feelings for you anymore. It's just empty. And sad.

History has been written in all the now empty spaces. In the air of the town...the malls...the bus stops...I can't pretend anymore.

The now empty seats, I cannot burn. Only bury deep under. There are places where your shadows still haunt. And I wish I could cry. I wish.

I wish you well.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Sunday, May 20, 2012


"Perempuan pakai tudung baik. Perempuan tak pakai tudung jahat."

Sumpah rasa nak lempang orang cakap macam tu. Memang senang mulut tu nak luahkan kata-kata stereotype tu. Wahai lelaki, apa kata cuba try test dulu pakai tudung tu, pastu baru buka mulut tu.

Memang senang kan nak judge orang? Apa yang susah? Bukan kau yang rasa hidup dia. Kau tengok je. 

So freaking narrow-minded. Pffttt.

Lauk kat semua restaurant pun nampak sedap. Tapi bila rasa? Adakah semuanya sedap?

Yang pakai tudung tu, berapa ramai yang merokok, merempit, lepak tengah malam dengan laki....segala bagai?

Yang tak pakai tu memang confirm ke merokok, merempit segala bagai tu?

Yang pakai boleh jadi tak pakai, yang tak pakai pun boleh jadi pakai.

Here's an advice you should take:

If u see a sexy girl, going to the mosque and pray, dont judge. Pray for her. Pray that one day, she will go to the mosque well covered.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

More than just songs.

Maybe I should give up?

Standin' out in the rain 
Need to know if it's over 
'Cause I will leave you alone.

I'm flooded with all this pain 
Knowing I'll never hold her 
Like I did before the storm.

Honestly, the lyrics hold so much meaning, to those that have felt it. And I have before. Which is why I felt like crying listening to the song.

I absolutely loathe the singers. *nak tahu siapa? Google la sendiri!* But the meaning behind the song, portraying itself through its lyrics, like poetry, depicting and illustrating exactly what you feel.

Many people, I am sure, post up song lyrics and poems and quotes as their statuses of Facebook and Twitter because the songs speak out what they can never really say. The songs are always meant for someone. Always.

I don't mind at all 
I don't mind that you only call me when you want 
And I'm just glad you want me at all 

And hearts that break the night in two 
And arms that can't hold you that true 

 So use me

Thursday, May 10, 2012

College Life, I bid goodbye.

I was packed and ready to go, and three beautiful girls stood in front of me:
Adlin, Aqilah and Azra.

Me, Adlin, Hasee, Asilah, Azra

The girls that have been there for me this whole semester. The days I was in tears. The days I had to face my fears. Choosing outfits. All our laughters. We slept together, studied together and took a step to adulthood together. Each one of them teaching me their own kind of lesson, each one always motivating to move forward, to shoot a few times. And to learn that you don't have to score all the time, you just have to try hard enough, with each other, having each other's backs.

You're not supposed to judge. You're supposed to keep their secret like keeping your own. You're not supposed to be correct all the time. You are human. You make mistakes. But you grow up from these mistakes. You learn. And the most important thing of all, I learnt that some people come and go, and others, they stick.

I love you, girls.
Always had. Always will.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Unfold the unknown story of the unmentioned, unspoken and untold.

I stopped in my tracks. Your eyes bore into mine.

There are a thousand words that I could say to you. Wanted to say to you.

To tell you how I feel.

And yet, those thousands of words are taken from me, ripped from my heart into an abyss of nothingness.

You walk away. 

Between us are walls and gaps and a heart, whether broken or attached. Between us is a hope and reality, whether complimenting the other or only causing a mass destruction. Between us, is a story. 

That no one knows. Nor do they understand. Because they never saw it. Not really.

Just glimpses, that we allowed slip.

Just stolen glances, and silent prayers.

Never the touch. The winks. The slipping of the ring onto my finger. Unto your finger.

And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told?