Saturday, May 7, 2011

In a deep slumber, I dreamt about us. And you chose me. But we will never be together.

Unlike on Tumblr, I'm gonna write out my dream. In hopes that someone will read it and understand it...

It started with me being a chaperon to Ms. Arveen's class to Godknowswhere and by some miracle you were there too. Coaching a group of students in that sports that you play.

Then, of course we weren't going to the same place at first. But again, for some miracle reason, the place I was headed to was close so we decided to check out your game and your 'community'. A weird community that is.

So, I was half-hiding-half-hoping that you'd see me. And I could hear your voice. You were THAT close. SO close.

After awhile, I kinda went and made myself seen by going for a tour with this dude who may-or-may-not exist in real life. And you saw me. So you texted me.

I wanted to reply. I already typed it out. Something about me not having hard feelings or me being pissed off but I wanted to act like I'm fine or something.

Then, there was your dad...hmmm...things got kind of complicated. And I asked you to tell me the truth. You didn't. Because your dad was there. But the thing is, I already know about your 'community' and whatever...

You started to walk away. And I was supposed to let you go. But I felt something. A longing. A sense of belonging. I ran to you. I ran into you. And put my arms around you with tears in my eyes.

Somewhere between the horrified reaction I got from a bunch of people and this spark, you chose me.

Which was most definitely NOT supposed to happen. So something happened. Everything went out in smoke. And things zoomed out and the next thing you know, I was seeing the world. And everyone was on the floor. Fainted. Except your community type of people. They became worms or bugs. Colourful worms. Like green and pink and stuff...And the bugs can fly. And the bugs flew to this window and filled it up. And then, blackness. Like the world ended or something.

And I'm just watching it all in the cinema with my mum. WEIRD.
Then, we discussed the movie and I was like, the 'us' in the movie didn't end up together. Because the world ended. And even if it didn't, you became a worm.

*And in all honesty...it's heartbreaking in a weird what-the-hell-was-that kinda way.

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