Friday, May 28, 2010

Questions with a devastatingly short answer...

I usually post on my private blog about what really happened, but now, it's war.

I didn’t know that anyone could feel so…so stupid.

“Anything?” he asked. Ah! Like he didn’t know! As if la! Think he so pro!

“We are going to be in the same room and all…”
Seriously? That was what he first said. Excuse me! Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid. You KNOW what I’m asking you.

“Yeah, I know…”
If you know what I’m asking than why the hell are you acting so retarded?

“I planned to go alone.”

“No hard feelings?”
I don’t know. I can’t feel. I literally CAN’T F***ING FEEL ANYTHING RIGHT NOW!

“So who’s the guy?”
OH. MY. GOD. OH MY GOD! SERIOUSLY? Don’t you dare act like you don’t know. Want me to say it out loud? FINE. It’s you, obviously.

“Thanks for making me the ‘right guy’ *something like that*…”
I did not MAKE you the right guy. Hell, I wouldn’t choose you if I had to follow my brain. But the heart is whole other organ. Don’t thank me cause you’re just KILLING me! I can make it through 2 weeks.

After that, it’s goodbye. I can get through this. I CAN! I MUST! I…I…I just want to hang myself.
The thing is…I don’t care that the ‘right guy’ is soooo in the wrong. I don’t. But damn, I feel so vulnerable. Like, you can just put a knife through my chest, twist and pull…if you wanted to.

And still, ffter everything, I still say that I rather hurt now than later.

But…damn! That hurt. You racist a$$.


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